Monday, May 2, 2011
Inception is a major headache. @ 9:47 PM
I think it's true. But these meanings more or less reflect my views or my life.
For example, my blog post titles.
A recent title, Sterotypes. For me, sterotypes are just fucked up. Look at this picture.
"I am a gay, so I cannot have guy friends as I will hit on all of them."
"I get excellent grades, I must have no friends and study all day."
"I am skinny, so I must be anorexic."
"I am blonde, I must be stupid."
"I am emo, so I must cut my wrists."
"I am African-American, I must be poor."
"I am religious, so I must shove my beliefs down your throat."
"I am not a virgin, I must be a slut."
"I am a virgin, no one wants to fuck me."
There so many more I can name. Sterotypes are not who you are, but who people judge you as. For me, I am fat. I go under the "When I see food, I have to eat it", "I am lazy because I don't want to lose weight and look good", "I am a loser" categories. And sometimes, I actually believe it. No, I actually believe it all the time.
Another title, "What's written on your tombstone?"
To me, it's like what will you achieve in life. What do you want people to write about you when you die. "In memory of a loving father, a wonderful friend and a beautiful person" Or "Some son of a bitch coward who decided to commit suicide". Then, I'll think about, what will be written on my tombstone. How are people around me going to remember me as?
I think a lot, and sometimes, I don't want to pen it down because it then will lose it's value, so I agree with my friend that what I say has hidden meaning, in a good way or bad.
This friend actually gave me some sort of a wake up call because we used to be extremely close, and I really never thought we would drift apart, but we did, like every other friendship. I miss this friend a lot, but I know that things cannot be how they used to anymore. Though we still talk, but it just doesn't feel the same.
If you're reading this, I just wanted to let you know I treasure our friendship. A lot.
Okay Ariel, stop with the reminiscence.
I have another issue to rant about.
Cutters.
Yesterday, my friend posted a status about them. I would like to say she is a good person, maybe it's just her views, but I don't think it's talking about all cutters, just maybe a specific group.
For me, I feel that people who cut themselves don't really want to die. I guess this is another sterotype for all cutters. So many people seem to hate on them. 32 likes for this status and so many comments asking these cutters to die.
Cutting is a process whereby one feels like dying, and just doesn't have the edge to do so yet, but really, if I am a cutter, and I see so many people hating on me, it will just push me over the edge.
Why not instead using this hate, changing it into ways that it will help these cutters to quit?
Invest time to try and give them some joy, because the truth is, we never really know what others are going through in life. Abuse? An outcast feeling? No family? We never know. Make these cutters feel some love. Make them feel like they're worth something.
Also, cutters who post photos of themselves. To me, it is actually a good sign. It's the cutter asking people to look, trying to bring across a message, "hey, I need a little help, can someone help me out?" I think it is a good thing. What about those who cut and stay silent? So compared to someone who cuts and announces, and someone who cuts and keep quiet, I'd rather the first one, because then at least I can do something to help out.
Cutters are mostly people who get hurt by others, and when they get hurt by others, they just feel.. I'm not too sure how to describe it. They just want to hurt themselves to be in control of who gets to really hurt them. You know what I mean? Scars don't really mean a thing. Sure there is pain in cutting yourself, but with this pain, comes a comfort that I guess only cutters will understand.
I have friends who cut, and I am really trying to make them stop. Others might not care, I have seen people who know their friends cut and just keep quiet. Maybe they don't know how to broach the subject or they just simply don't care. If I have any cutters reading my blog, Please, stop.
Not everyone's life is perfect, I hope we don't judge, even if it's somewhat a human instinct to so do.
I have more to add, but I shall just leave it to your thoughts. How you yourself feel about cutters. I also want to say that I censored her name for a reason. She's a good person, and everyone has their own views, don't hate on her :) She's really is a nice person.
ALRIGHT. Sorry for all my lengthy posts nowadays, I promise to shorten them. It's just that I think about things so much and I need a space to rant. Sorry guys, heh.
Today I went out with Gillian last minute to check out what's wrong with Allie. We went to Simei Pet Safari and ahem, I was right, hahah. Allie just had some bruises from a fight with Ollie that's all. *Points to her over-paranoid owner who will put her child in a bubble ball next time* LOL. We bought medicine and left for Tamp to eat. ALLIE PEED ON MY HAND LEH WLAO. And Gillian's also, hahah. Ate and all then walked around and saw Ashley and gang, LOL the scissors (Y).
Left around 7pm and bus-ed home with Gillian. I am so dead as well I owe my literature teacher an overdue homework. I, am, so dead. It's 11pm+ and I should be doing my school shit now. Today was a good day, especially since there is no school :)
A big thank you for everyone who gave me good and bad feedback on my cover. Love you guys. You all really gave me a huge boost to my confidence :)
Sigh. I'm going to miss Mr Neo. Alright, good night, thanks for helping me hit 58 views yesterday :)
Cutting is a process whereby one feels like dying, and just doesn't have the edge to do so yet, but really, if I am a cutter, and I see so many people hating on me, it will just push me over the edge.
Why not instead using this hate, changing it into ways that it will help these cutters to quit?
Invest time to try and give them some joy, because the truth is, we never really know what others are going through in life. Abuse? An outcast feeling? No family? We never know. Make these cutters feel some love. Make them feel like they're worth something.
Also, cutters who post photos of themselves. To me, it is actually a good sign. It's the cutter asking people to look, trying to bring across a message, "hey, I need a little help, can someone help me out?" I think it is a good thing. What about those who cut and stay silent? So compared to someone who cuts and announces, and someone who cuts and keep quiet, I'd rather the first one, because then at least I can do something to help out.
Cutters are mostly people who get hurt by others, and when they get hurt by others, they just feel.. I'm not too sure how to describe it. They just want to hurt themselves to be in control of who gets to really hurt them. You know what I mean? Scars don't really mean a thing. Sure there is pain in cutting yourself, but with this pain, comes a comfort that I guess only cutters will understand.
I have friends who cut, and I am really trying to make them stop. Others might not care, I have seen people who know their friends cut and just keep quiet. Maybe they don't know how to broach the subject or they just simply don't care. If I have any cutters reading my blog, Please, stop.
Not everyone's life is perfect, I hope we don't judge, even if it's somewhat a human instinct to so do.
Kay, sorry for the "gore" photo, but you've probably seen it anyway unless you hate Pink Flyod a lot.
I have more to add, but I shall just leave it to your thoughts. How you yourself feel about cutters. I also want to say that I censored her name for a reason. She's a good person, and everyone has their own views, don't hate on her :) She's really is a nice person.
ALRIGHT. Sorry for all my lengthy posts nowadays, I promise to shorten them. It's just that I think about things so much and I need a space to rant. Sorry guys, heh.
Today I went out with Gillian last minute to check out what's wrong with Allie. We went to Simei Pet Safari and ahem, I was right, hahah. Allie just had some bruises from a fight with Ollie that's all. *Points to her over-paranoid owner who will put her child in a bubble ball next time* LOL. We bought medicine and left for Tamp to eat. ALLIE PEED ON MY HAND LEH WLAO. And Gillian's also, hahah. Ate and all then walked around and saw Ashley and gang, LOL the scissors (Y).
Left around 7pm and bus-ed home with Gillian. I am so dead as well I owe my literature teacher an overdue homework. I, am, so dead. It's 11pm+ and I should be doing my school shit now. Today was a good day, especially since there is no school :)
A big thank you for everyone who gave me good and bad feedback on my cover. Love you guys. You all really gave me a huge boost to my confidence :)
Sigh. I'm going to miss Mr Neo. Alright, good night, thanks for helping me hit 58 views yesterday :)
